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ACT I/ SCENE 4: 'A Record in a Record in a Record'
FX: Morning Sounds
Valerie and Josef are playing with table tennis balls. In turn, they put them in their
mouths and see how far they can propel them. Eventually...
Nice one, Val.
Twelve feet if an inch
Oh more, more
Beat that... if you dare.
I don't know, Val.
Beat that, Beat that, Beat that!
I can't top you, Val.
Yes, you can. Yes, you can. Go ahead, Josef. Please, please, please, go ahead.
Let me give it a go then.
Yes, Josef, you can do it... You can do it. No, wait, no, no. Stand up. Let me help you.
Stand up. (She struggles to get him to his feet)
Easy with that
Come on. Yes, good, good. All right now you stand like this and... Give me your hand.
Give it to me!
(As he does so, she places his arms in an awkward position and then bends one of his
What you at?
There. Here. (She places a table tennis ball in his mouth.)
Now, just like that and... Go!
(She pushes him and he hops about the stage)
Ahhhh! Ahhh! Go ahead, Josef! Beat me, Beat me, Beat me!
Mr. and Mrs. Dumpling enter. Josef starts hopping around them.
Have you done yourself an injury, Josef?
Your face is all swollen.
Valerie, what's wrong with Josef?
He's foaming at the mouth.
He certainly is!
(She chases after Josef attempting to wipe his mouth with her skirt.)
Careful, Mother. He may be catching.
(As she continues to chase after Josef)
Josef, Josef... Let me see... Be still, Josef, be still!